Kids, part 1

Over the years we’ve jotted down things the kids said that have had us in stitches or in tears, and have helped us see the world through their eyes. We’re very glad we did it…

Lauren, age 2

Roads on the Oregon Coast were being repaired after winter storms. When a car passed us driving much too fast on a large patch of gravel, Tom muttered, “Idiot!” Lauren immediately wanted to know what an idiot was. The next night we were driving on the same stretch of road and Lauren asked, “Daddy, where’s the idiot?”  

Lauren, age 3

The day after the U.S. Presidential election between Bob Dole and Bill Clinton Lauren asked at the breakfast table, “Mom, where’s Bob Dole?”

Lauren 4-1/2, Zack 2-1/2

Our friend Bud was going to Albania to help coordinate services to refugees from Kosovo. We talked with the kids about how we need to pray for Bud because he will be in a dangerous place, that God would bless his work, keep him safe, etc. That week the following conversation occurred at breakfast:

Zack: Mom, is Bob going to a dangerous place?
Lauren: It’s Bud, not Bob.
Zack: Oh yeah. Mom, is Bud going to a dangerous place?
Mom: Yes, and that’s why we need to pray that God would take care of him and keep him safe.
Lauren: But who is worried about Bud?
Mom: Patti is, but she’s also trusting God to take care of Bud.
Lauren: What does ‘trusting God’ mean?
Mom: Trusting God means that we can know when we ask God something, he listens to what we are asking and pays attention to it.
Lauren: Oh, you mean like ‘counting on’ God?
Mom: That’s right!
Lauren: So, we can count on God to take care of Bud, right?
Mom: Right.

* * * * *
At the zoo Zack says, “Mom, smell my breath.” Mom obliges and says, “It smells like apple.” Zack responds, “No, it’s tree sap.”

* * * * *
During dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant, Zack ate Gorgonzola cheese, mussels, veal and capers. A couple weeks later he asked, “When can we go to a restaurant again that has Gorgonzola cheese?”

* * * * *
To prepare for our first family camping trip, Tom and Zack “camped out” in sleeping bags on the living room floor. In the middle of the night, Tom felt a little hand exploring his face and heard a quiet voice whisper, “There’s the bump on Daddy’s nose.”

Zack 3

Zack tells Lauren, “Come over here. I want to bonk your head.”

* * * * *
The kids both think they were in heaven before they were born. When Lauren decided that she had come from heaven in a baby carriage, Zack announced, “Well, I came down from heaven in a race car!”

Lauren 5-1/2, Zack 3-1/2

When putting Zack to bed, the routine must be just so: he wants his blankie spread out, and he checks it with his hands to be sure it’s smooth. He tells us, “Don’t make a hot spot,” meaning that it’s OK to kneel by his bed but not to lean on it, because it warms up the bedclothes.

* * * * *
In a discussion about body parts, Lauren describes babies as having “arms and legs and an extension cord.”

* * * * *
At the dinner table, Lauren was describing how a garbage truck used to go by right outside of her classroom window at school. She started to say, “It went on the left side,” and then she put her right finger into her left nostril and asked, “Is this left?”

* * * * *
While reading Bible stories to Lauren at bedtime, I came to one about Jesus visiting in the home of two sisters. “This is the story of two sisters, Mary and …” I paused. Lauren immediately chimed in, “Barbara!”

* * * * *
Zack wonders out loud: “When I’m grown up, and I’m Uncle John’s uncle, I’ll be able to touch hot things on the stove, won’t I?”

* * * * *
Zack’s pre-school featured a different color each week. The first week was red week, and Zack wore red socks, red pants, a red belt, red t-shirt and a red hat. He said that no one else wore red pants and shirt, and that “they enjoyed my redness.”

* * * * *
At bedtime we were talking about God’s ability to heal. Zack said, “And God has freeze power. Freeze power is when God butts the bad guys into the air like a unicorn.”

* * * * *
We visited a local farm with friends, and the kids loved the little kid goats running around. The adults were finishing lunch while the kids fed and played with the goats. Suddenly they all ran back to us and Zack shouted, “I got a horn butt from the goat!” It was the best part of his day.

* * * * *
We were watching a family movie when Zack pulled my head back and looked into my eye. He asked me, “Daddy, do your eyes have blood shots in them?”

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2 responses to “Kids, part 1

  1. I laughed my way through this entire post!

  2. This is a great idea and precious… This is my favorite…“When I have new skin, I think I’ll be brown.”

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